Empowered Living International

Hardened Heart–The Main Cause of Divorce

Michele Benson — Thu, 19 Feb 2009 21:07:55 +0000

Matthew 19:3-8

Some Pharisees came to Him to test Him. They asked, “Is it lawful for a man to divorce his wife for any and every reason?”" Haven’t you read,’ He replied, “that at the beginning the Creator made them male and female and said, ‘For this reason a man will leave his father and mother and be united to his wife and the two will become one flesh’? So they are no longer two, but one. Therefore what God has joined together let man not separate.” “Why then,” they asked, “did Moses command that a man give his wife a certificate of divorce and send her away?” Jesus replied, “Moses permitted you to divorce your wives because your hearts were hardened. But it was not this way from the beginning. I tell you that anyone divorces his wife, except for marital unfaithfulness and marries another woman commits adultery.”

A hard heart is the only cause of divorce. No matter what has happened, it can all be traced back to a hard heart. If someone commits adultery, their heart has hardened toward their spouse. Abusiveness–hard heart. If a couple fights over finances, one or both have hardened their hearts to the other by putting finances first either by being inconsiderate of the other’s wishes in managing the finances or placing the importance of money over their spouse. No matter what the situation is, it all can be attributed to a hard heart. Either one or both had a hardened heart from the beginning or they allowed it to happen over time.

The good news is that a hardened heart can be fixed. Much of what goes on in marriage counseling is trying to get both parties to see the other’s point of view. Why? Because when you understand what the other is really going through, your heart is softened toward them. Also, it helps you prevent yourself from doing the things that caused your partner’s heart to be hardened in the first place.

Steps to a softer heart

Put yourself in the other person’s shoes. You must understand each other’s point of view. If it is your spouse that has a hardened heart, then put yourself in their shoes to see why this has happened. After you find the cause, then take practical steps to reverse it. For example, if your spouse desires a clean house and environment and you are a slob, then this may be why their hearts have hardened. Once you discover this, then create a clean environment for them and watch how their hearts will soften towards you. This may take time because people are generally skeptical. They may not think it will last, so you must remain consistent.
Prayer. Many times a person’s heart is hardened due to past hurts. It may be nothing you have done and nothing you can change in yourself to fix it. If there is nothing you can do, then there is one thing you can do–prayer! You can pray that your spouse be free from all past hurts. Jesus not only came to heal our bodies, but He came to heal the broken-hearted (Luke 4:18). God said he would replace our hearts of stone with a heart of flesh (Ezekiel 11:19). Well, what is stone? HARD. That is simply saying that God can soften our hearts. You can pray that the love of God can be shed abroad in our hearts by the Holy Spirit (Romans 5:5). If you spouse is not saved, there is still hope. God can not only soften our hearts toward each other, but towards Him.
Intimacy. Intimacy softens the heart. Spending time in worship with God is intimacy with God. Worship doesn’t change God, but it changes us. It softens our heart. Spending intimate time with your spouse will soften your partner’s heart towards you. Intimacy is focusing solely on that person and blocking out distractions.

Throughout all of this, the key is to be patient. When dealing with people, it sometimes takes time. While you are waiting, remember that God honors marriage and it is His will that every marriage be successful. If you seek Him with all of your heart, He will not only repair your marriage, but make it better than it has even been.

Michele Benson — Mon, 02 Feb 2009 21:29:30 +0000

Welcome to Empowered Living International. Our mission at ELI is to equip and empower the Body of Christ to live victoriously. This will be done by teaching Christians how to overcome the various trials in life by living by faith. I pray that you are blessed by this site. Feel free to contact me if you have any questions or prayer requests.

Recession Buster # 1

Michele Benson — Mon, 02 Feb 2009 21:12:48 +0000

In this day and time, the main topic of conversation is the recession. You can’t even watch the news without hearing something about it. I am not belittling the hard times that people are going through, but in the Bible they didn’t go through recessions. They went through famines and droughts. Recession is simply a time of decreased economic activity, but a famine is an extreme shortage of food. When they had a famine, it affected the whole land. So unlike today, they couldn’t borrow the money from someone else or go to the salvation army or get food stamps. Everyone was without food! Despite this, the obedient servants of God still prospered during times of famine. Notice I said “obedient.” Let’s look at I Kings 17:1. Here’s a little history of the passage. In the 16th chapter, God said that Ahab was the most evil king that Israel had ever had. I Kings 17:1 says this, And Elijah the Tishbite, of the inhabitants of Gilead, said to Ahab, “As the LORD God of Israel lives, before whom I stand, there shall not be dew nor rain these years, except at my word.” Elijah’s trust in God was so strong that he spoke economic hard times over the land that he lived in knowing that it would not affect him. I Kings 17:2-5 continues on and says, Then the word of the LORD came to him, saying, “Get away from here and turn eastward, and hide by the Brook Cherith, which flows into the Jordan. And it will be that you shall drink from the brook, and I have commanded the ravens to feed you there.” Immediately, God gave Elijah instructions because Elijah had a relationship with God. He didn’t just turn to him during hard times. Verse 5 through 7 of I Kings 17 says this So he went and did according to the word of the LORD, for he went and stayed by the Brook Cherith, which flows into the Jordan. The ravens brought him bread and meat in the morning, and bread and meat in the evening; and he drank from the brook. Elijah did as God instructed and therefore he was provided for. Verse 7 says this “And it happened after a while that the brook dried up, because there had been no rain in the land.” What do you think happened next? Elijah basically lost his job. He lost the channel that God was using to provide for him. Do you think he cried and was mad at God because God told him to go there and now the source is dried up? Because Elijah was close to God and had an ongoing relationship with Him, God immediately gave him instructions again. I Kings 17:8-9 says this Then the word of the LORD came to him, saying, “Arise, go to Zarephath, which belongs to Sidon, and dwell there. See, I have commanded a widow there to provide for you.” God already had a plan for Elijah. Verse 10 through 14 says this So he arose and went to Zarephath. And when he came to the gate of the city, indeed a widow was there gathering sticks. And he called to her and said, “Please bring me a little water in a cup, that I may drink.” And as she was going to get it, he called to her and said, “Please bring me a morsel of bread in your hand.” So she said, “As the LORD your God lives, I do not have bread, only a handful of flour in a bin, and a little oil in a jar; and see, I am gathering a couple of sticks that I may go in and prepare it for myself and my son, that we may eat it, and die.” And Elijah said to her, “Do not fear; go and do as you have said, but make me a small cake from it first, and bring it to me; and afterward make some for yourself and your son. For thus says the LORD God of Israel: ‘The bin of flour shall not be used up, nor shall the jar of oil run dry, until the day the LORD sends rain on the earth.’” Not only did God have a plan for Elijah, but he wanted to provide for the widow woman also. All she had to do be obedient to the man of God. Verse 15 and 16 tell what happened. So she went away and did according to the word of Elijah; and she and he and her household ate for many days. The bin of flour was not used up, nor did the jar of oil run dry, according to the word of the LORD which He spoke by Elijah. Basically, everyone in the land was suffering except those that were obedient to God like Elijah and the widow woman. During these times of recession, we need to take our trust out of our jobs, the president, or anything else and put it back into the one who created us. It doesn’t matter what is going on in the world, we can still have all of our needs met like Elijah did.

Your Joy is Found in Your Purpose

Michele Benson — Wed, 28 Jan 2009 21:43:45 +0000

Many people are in the world searching for something to make them happy. They look in a man, a woman, drugs, career, and the list goes on. These people pursue after these things with full force to only discover that they are still not happy. The only way we are going to be truly happy is to find out what we were created for and walk in it. Purpose is defined as original intent or the reason you were created. Look at cars, for example, if you try to drive a Cadillac through mud and rough terrain, you are most likely going to get stuck and tear up your car. A Cadillac can’t do the job of a Jeep nor can a Jeep provide the same luxury and comfort that a Cadillac does. They each have their own purpose and everyone is going to be happier if they do what they are supposed to do and not try to copy the other. We have so many people who are jealous of others and try to do what they do. We are never going to be happy until we do what we, as individuals, were made for. The only way to know what we were made for is to consult the Manufacturer, Jesus. God had a purpose set for us even before we were born. Jeremiah 1:5 (Message Translation )says this “Before I shaped you in the womb, I knew all about you. Before you saw the light of day, I had holy plans for you.God says in Jeremiah 29:11 “For I know the thoughts that I think toward you, says the LORD, thoughts of peace and not of evil, to give you a future and a hope. Whatever plan God has for us as individuals, we are going to experience true happiness when we are walking in it. God loves each and every one of us and wants us to have a wonderful life. Jesus said in John 10:10 (New Living Translation) The thief’s purpose is to steal and kill and destroy. My purpose is to give them a rich and satisfying life. Whatever your purpose is, it is going to make your life rich and satisfying.God has a wonderful plan for each of our lives, but we must consult him to see what that plan is. Proverbs 3:6 (New Living Translations) says this, Seek his will in all you do, and he will show you which path to take. We must be willing, however, to folow God’s plan for our lives and not our own agenda. Job 33:14-17 (NKJV) For God may speak in one way, or in another, Yet man does not perceive it. In a dream, in a vision of the night, When deep sleep falls upon men, While slumbering on their beds, Then He opens the ears of men, And seals their instruction. In order to turn man from his deed, and conceal pride from man. God will speak to you concerning your purpose, but you must be able to hear Him. Sometimes he speaks to people in dreams like the scripture above. Sometimes he uses a Godly man or woman to speak to you. Sometimes he just speaks to you in what we call that “still, small voice.” That is when you know deep down in your “knower” that it is God speaking to you. Since God created us and gave us our purpose, it is going to be a Godly purpose. No one’s purpose is to sing music talking about sex or degrading women. God may have called you to sing, but not to sing in a sinful manner.

When you are walking in God’s purpose for your life, things will turn out for the best. Romans 8:28 says “And we know that all things work together for good to them that love God, to them who are the called according to His purpose.” You notice that it says His purpose, not something you have made up for yourself. What better person is there to know why something is created than the person that made it?

If you are searching for happiness and can’t seem to find it, first look to Jesus. After that is taken care of, find out what His plan is for your life. I guarantee that you find that happiness and contentment that you have always been looking for.

I will tell you from personal experience, that since I began walking in my God-given purpose that I have never been happier. Part of my purpose is that I help the people of God become victorious in every aspect of their lives. One way I can accomplish that is to help each person discover their purpose. I hope this has helped you. If you need help in finding what your purpose is, send me a message and I will pray with you.

Prayer by Billy Graham

Michele Benson — Tue, 27 Jan 2009 01:21:21 +0000

This is a prayer by Billy Graham that I received in an email. Powerful stuff!

‘Heavenly Father, we come before you today to ask your forgiveness and to seek your direction and guidance. We know Your Word says, ‘Woe to those who call evil good,’ but that is exactly what we have done. We have lost our spiritual equilibrium and reversed our values. We have exploited the poor and called it the lottery. We have rewarded laziness and called it welfare. We have killed our unborn and called it choice. We have shot abortionists and called it justifiable. We have neglected to discipline our children and called it building self esteem. We have abused power and called it politics. We have coveted our neighbor’s possessions and called it ambition. We have polluted the air with profanity and pornography and called it freedom of expression. We have ridiculed the time-honored values of our forefathers and called it enlightenment. Search us, Oh God, and know our hearts today; cleanse us from every sin and Set us free. Amen!’Enough said!

Commentator Paul Harvey aired this prayer on his radio program, ‘The Rest of the Story,’ and received a larger response to this program than any other he has ever aired. With the Lord’s help, may this prayer sweep over our nation and wholeheartedly become our desire so that we again can be called ‘One nation under God.’

How to Activate the Power of God in Your Life

Michele Benson — Mon, 26 Jan 2009 23:54:54 +0000

First, I would like to acknowledge my Pastor, William Doc Murphy. This blog is actually taken from my notes of a sermon he preached. It is such a important message that I wanted as many people as possible to get it. I pray that I communicate it as well as he did.
If you are a born again believer, then God has given you power to live a victorious life. Luke 10:17-19 says, “And the seventy returned again with joy saying, Lord even the devils are subject unto us through thy name. And he said unto them, I beheld Satan as lightening fall from heaven. Behold, I give unto you power to tread on serpents and scorpions and over all the power of the enemy and nothing shall by any means hurt you.” Satan is subject to us through the name of Jesus. Satan does have power, but that is not the problem. The problem is that the people of God are not using the power given to them.
What exactly is the power that is given to us: two things, the Holy Spirit and the Word of God. Romans 1:16 says, “For I am not ashamed of the gospel of Christ for it is the power of God unto salvation to everyone that believeth; to the Jew first, and also to the Greek.” The word “salvation” in this passage not only means saving your soul, but also deliverance, preservation, well being, prosperity, and healing. Notice it says “to every one that believeth.” The “-eth” on believeth means that we must continue to believe. We can’t believe one minute and doubt the next. You must believe the Word when you read it and when you speak it. Even if you are filled with the Holy Spirit, you must know the Word also. You must know you have that power in order to use it.
Acts 1:8 says, “But ye shall receive power, after that the Holy Ghost is come upon you: and ye shall be witnesses unto me both in Jerusalem, and in all Judaea, and in Samaria, and unto the uttermost part of the earth.” This says that you will receive power after the Holy Spirit comes upon you. The Greek word for power there is “dudamus” which means dynamite. The power of God will blow up everything in your life that is not supposed to be there. Power also means “the ability to do.” It also refers to the power of God and influence.
Ephesians 3:7 says, “Whereof I was made a minister, according to the gift of the grace of God given unto me by the effectual working of his power.” Paul is saying here that God gave him power to do what He called him to do. God is not going to ask you to do something without giving you the power to do it.
Ephesians 3:16 says, “That he would grant you, according to the riches of his glory, to be strengthened with might by his Spirit in the inner man; ” We get strengthen by the Holy Spirit from the inside out.
Ephesians 3:20 says, “Now unto him that is able to do exceeding abundantly above all that we ask or think, according to the power that worketh in us.” The power must be working in us. We must have the Holy Spirit in us and continually put the Word of God in us and continually speaking the Word.
The power of God will bring ability, influence, and exceeding abundance and above, as long as the power works in you. Like I said earlier, Satan does have power, but if you have the Word of God and the Holy Spirit working in your life, then there is nothing he can do to harm you. God has given us the power to obtain wealth, be a witness for him, heal the sick, and be victorious in every area of our lives. I am going to use mine, how about you?

GOD SAID . . .

Michele Benson — Thu, 27 Nov 2008 13:11:06 +0000

This is for all of the Spirit-filled Christians. I have been in the church for 10 years and have seen a lot of stuff. Recent events in my life have spurred me to write this. Yes, if you are Spirit-filled God does speak to you in that “still small voice.” He also speaks to you in dreams. I lovingly urge you to be careful what you are saying that God said. Many people have good intentions, but they are going on their emotions rather than what God actually told them. A very good friend of mine had a dream and interpreted completely wrong and in the process hurt some very good people. I believe he made this mistake because, number one, he had some people in his life speaking things against the person that he made the mistaken interpretation about. BE CAREFUL WHAT YOU ALLOW IN YOUR EARS!!! When you are Spirit-filled, one of the gifts you received is discernment. Discernment allows you to know who is full of the Spirit and who is “full of it” if you know what I mean. I once had someone “prophesy” to me or, as my Pastor calls it, propheLIE telling me to watch who I hang around and at the time I wasn’t hanging around anyone. I was staying to myself. This person assumed I was hanging around a certain person and she was jealous of her so she ended up speaking out of her jealousy and saying “God said.” Secondly, I believed my friend made the wrong interpretation because he had gotten excited about the spiritual gifts and he got caught up in the gifts rather than then giver of the Gifts. He also gave my husband a so-called “Word of Wisdom” that contradicted what God had spoken to me, my pastor, my husband, and another very strong spiritual leader in my life. He said there was some fleshwork going on. Now, I am not so spiritual to think that I never get in my flesh, but how is it possible that God spoke the same thing to four people and they are all wrong? My Pastor and the other spiritual leader I am talking about have never been known to speak inaccurately about what God has said. For that matter, neither have I. I take the two words “God said” very seriously. Yet, this person felt the need to “help” me and my husband, not knowing he was totally out of line. If you believe God has spoken to you about a certain thing, first or all, check it against the Word of God. It will never contradict the Word of God. Secondly, if what you are hearing contradicts what someone more spiritually mature than you is saying, then definitely check it. Satan knows the Word of God and is a copycat. He is the ultimate deceiver. I don’t want to discourage anyone from operating in the gifts of the Spirit because God does want to reveal things to us. I Corinthians 2:9-10 says this “But as it is written, Eye hath not seen, nor ear heard, neither have entered into the heart of man, the things which God hath prepared for them that love him. But God hath revealed them unto us by his Spirit: for the Spirit searcheth all things, yea, the deep things of God.” God does want to reveal things to you through His Spirit. I just want to urge you to be careful of what you say “God said.” Lying on God is a serious matter, no to mention you could hurt some innocent people in the process.

Are You Walking the Walk?

Michele Benson — Sun, 23 Nov 2008 20:54:14 +0000

As Christians, when we accept salvation we confess Jesus as Lord of our lives. Actually, most people accept Jesus as their savior, but very few accept Him as the Lord of their lives. Lord is another word for master. That means that we should consult him about every aspect of our lives. Every person has a specific purpose in their lives given to them by God. Your purpose is your original intent or the reason you were created. Ephesians 4:1, the Amplified version says this “I therefore, the prisoner of the Lord, appeal to you and beg you to walk (lead a life) worthy of the divine calling to which you have been called–with behavior that is a credit to the summons to God’s service.” Paul is talking here to the whole Ephesian church here, not just the Pastor or leaders which means each person in that church has a divine calling. Your purpose given to you by God is not going to be sinful, of course. It will in one way or another be used in building His kingdom. You may not be called to be a Pastor or evangelist, but you may be called to be a light in the business world or sports arena. Paul was begging the church to lead their lives worthy of the calling God has called each of them to which shows how important it is to God.
We must live our lives and fulfill our callings in a way to is pleasing to God. II Thessalonians 1:11 says this “Wherefore also we pray always for you, that our God would count you worthy of this calling, and fulfill and the good pleasure of his goodness, and the work of faith with power. The first step to walking worthy of our calling is to do it with faith and power. Faith is absolute reliance on God. Power comes from the Word of God and the Holy Spirit. Paul said in Romans 1:16 “For I am not ashamed of the gospel of Christ; for it is the power of God unto salvation to every one that believeth, to the Jew first, and also to the Greek.” That word salvation there means much more than just saving your soul from Hell. It means rescue, safety, deliverance, health, and prosperity. So the Word of God is power for deliverance into every area of our lives including fulfilling our purpose. Power also comes from the Holy Spirit. In Acts 1:8, Jesus promised us that power to help us fulfill what he asked us to do. But you shall receive power–ability, efficiency, and might–when the Holy Spirit has come upon you and you shall be my witnesses in Jerusalem and all Judea and Samaria and to the ends–the very bounds– of the earth.
Step two to walking worthy of your calling is live a holy life. When people call themselves Christians and act otherwise it only turns off people that could have potentially come into the Kingdom of God. Also, when you are not living a holy lifestyle, you are cutting of your power source.
Step three to walking worthy of the call is to stop making excuses! When you say you can’t fulfill something God has told you to do, you are not living in faith. Jeremiah 1:5-9 says this “Before I formed thee in the belly I knew thee; and before thou camest forth out of the womb I sanctified thee, and I ordained thee a prophet unto the nations. Then said I, Ah, Lord God! Behold I cannot speak for I am a child. But the Lord said unto me, Say not, I am a child, for thou shalt go to all that I shall send thee, and whatsoever I command thee thou shalt speak. Be not afraid of their faces: for I am with thee to deliver thee, saith the Lord. Then the Lord put forth his hand, and touched my mouth. And the Lord said unto me, Behold I have put my words in thy mouth. Jeremiah was trying to make excuses here why he could not do what God had asked him, but God would not allow it. God told Him he would give him what he needed to fulfill his purpose. Don’t say I am too young, I am too old, I don’t have any money, I am shy because whatever it is that you need to fulfill your purpose, God has it!
Step four to walking worthy in your purpose is to pursue it with all diligence. Diligence means giving every effort to something or working hard at it. II Peter 1:10 says “Wherefore the rather, brethren, give diligence to make your calling and election sure: for if ye do these things ye shall never fall.” Once again, he is talking here to the brethren which means people in the church, everyone not just certain people. It says here that if you give every effort to knowing what your calling is that you will never fall. It says never. Now, I know that people tell you that you are going to fall, but the Word of God here says you will never fall.
Step five to walking worthy of your calling is concencration or setting aside time to be with God and hear what he wants you to do and then, of course, obey what he says. In Genesis 22 starting at verse one, God asks Abraham to do something very difficult for him. Earlier God had told Abraham that he would be a father of many nations which is what the name Abraham means. Then in Genesis 22 God asks Abraham to give up His only son. That seems very contradictory. God told Abraham that he was a father of many nations and then asked him to give up his only son and he was already over a hundred years old by that time. Many times God will ask you to do something and it will not make sense. That is where trusting in God comes in. Abraham was obedient to God and when he was ready to sacrifice his son, God had a ram in the bush that he could sacrifice instead. Because Abraham was obedient, this is what an angel of the Lord said to him starting at verse 16. And said, By myself have I sworn, saith the Lord, for because thou hast done this thing, and hast not withheld thy son, thine only son: That in blessing I will bless thee, and and in multiplying, I will multiply thy seed as the stars of the heaven and the sand which is upon the sea shore; and thy seed shall possess the gate of his enemies; and in thy seed shall all the nations of the earth be blessed; because thou hast obeyed my voice.
As Paul begged the Ephesians to walk worthy of the call that God has given them, I am doing the same. If you follow the steps I have given you which are (number one) walk in your calling with power and faith which are obtained by the Word of God and the Holy Spirit; (number two) lead a lifestyle that is holy and pleasing to God; (number three) stop making excuses and remember God has everything you need to fulfill your purpose; (number four) to pursue you calling with diligence or with all of your heart; and (number five) spend time with God to hear from and be obedient to what he says. As you do these things, you will experience power and joy in the Holy Spirit like never before.